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The shirt is actually a bright, sunny yellow color, but the mood is decidedly grey.

Today I am missing my best friend.

This is a story all about how my life got flip-turned upside down.

My story is just like a million others. Nothing that hasn't been done to death many times over. But it's mine, and I own it. I take responsibility. And I'm ready for what comes next - whatever it looks like, smells like, tastes like. I'm no longer a detainee in my own life.

My head hurts today. I'm attempting to cut caffeine from my diet for some strange fucking reason that I, at this very moment, do not fucking understand. I think I've lost my motherfucking mind. And my fucking head is about the split the fuck open and I'm none to fucking happy about it right about now. Fuckity FUCK!

Oh, and I went to the gym today and ran on the treadmill for the first time in over a month. I actually did pretty well - I ended up running instead of just walking, which I thought I'd be too out-of-shape to do. Of course, that was before the headache.

Everything is everything.

It's Saturday. I'm not working. All is well.

Yay! It's August! It's my birthday month! Wait. Maybe it's not yay. Hmmm....

Shell gave me this book. I've enjoyed it, but it's more than a little twisted. I can totally get down with being tied up, but that's about as adventurous as I'm going to get. The girl in the story likes to be beaten, and I don't just mean a little slap and tickle - we're talking full-on belt whippings and whatnot. A bit much for me - but it's turned out to be interesting in the context of the full story.

If pressed to rate it, I'd give it 3 1/2 cat-o'-nine-tails out of 5.

Ok, so I suspected that she was fabulous, and I was so right. The first time she dropped the f-bomb (in a very feminine and soft-spoken manner, mind you - it was awe-inspiring) I knew I was in love. :o)

We sat outside under the trees and next to a fountain and had a lovely chat yesterday afternoon for lunch. She was warm and glowing and funny. I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

Thanks, D!

I got this lovely flower with my breakfast tray this morning. That plus the sunshine made me happy.

I am so excited about tomorrow, and my lunch date with the spectacularly lovely VintageDramas. I REALLY hope I don't embarrass myself too badly.

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So, I'm away again. Palo Alto, CA. I'm at a conference for work, and so far it's been good. All higher-education types and whatnot. I met some lovely people this evening at the mixer. My favorite so far has been Andrew from Emory University. We could be best friends.

Tonight I hung out with some old buddies and learned to play Chineese poker? I had no idea what I was doing, but I actually won. Made me wish I hadn't pooh-pooh'd the idea of playing for money, dammit!

A lazy sunday. I tried to find the Lazy Sunday C&H book, but it's disappeared into the vortex of crap - also known as Madison's bedroom. I was too afraid to go in there to look for it.

Despite the fact that I had to work today, it didn't turn out to be all that bad a day.

Madison is at her friend's house until who knows when, my charming husband isn't speaking to me, and the little one here is itching for something to do besides the dishes. Maybe I'll take her out for some tequila shots and boy-watching this evening. You know - a little mother/daughter bonding thing.

I've been a very, very bad girl of late. I can't even remember the last time I went to the gym. If I made a list of what I've eaten in the last couple of weeks, it'd probably make us all sick. And this weekend is the last one of reckless abandon. Monday morning, bright and early, I'm back to the gym and back on the wagon. For reals.

Stop laughing.